Askaria

D&D campaign character Askaria the tiefling rogue.

I'm so lucky.

This is my girlfriend. I'm so lucky to have her. She is sooo cute and amazing.
We went to IHOP together and had a lovely breakfast for dinner. It was really fun. :)

Went to Wendy's yesterday

Went to Wendy's yesterday with my baby sister and had siracha bacon fries with a siracha bacon burger. So much siracha.

I come back

I know it has been awhile since I posted. I really just got super busy and stopped paying attention to the blogs that I started. My computer broke so I am using an app on my phone and it is proving a little difficult. It has trouble with photos so when my computer is fixed I'll start posting photos again. I want to broaden the scope of this blog and thus increase my blogging time. I hope I will slowly regain the trust and viewership I once had again.

Quote of the Day

Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world. 

-Harriet Tubman

Journal 10/8/16

I'm babysitting my cousins today. It should be fun. There are four of them with the youngest being about one years old. They are really cute and I love little kids. It's only for a little while though about 3 hours. When I'm back though I get to go see my other cousins that are about 5 and that should be nice. I'm seeing a lot of family today.

Went to the zoo with my baby sister

Journal 10/7/16

Going to the zoo with my mom and baby sister. Today is brisk but beautiful and later I'm going to go to a barbeque at my old high school. Today looks like it'll be a fun day.

This morning I woke up at 4 and couldn't really fall asleep after that. It was terrible but I did forget to take melatonin last night. I am really tired and sluggish today which is why my posts are so late. I have continued work on my book and submitted the first chapter of my book to a contest. Hopefully, they will like it and ask for more to possibly publish it. It's exciting.

Nightly Journal 10/5/16

3 good things:
1. Ate Japanese food.
2. Made good head way on editing my book.
3. Moved back into my old room.

Something I did for myself today:
Worked out for 20 min.

Something I look forward to tomorrow:
More work on my book.

Quote of the Day 10/5/16

Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith.

- Steve Jobs

FLOWERS

Morning Journal 10/5/16

Last night I only woke up a few times which was nice. The bed was a little hard but I managed to sleep decently well. My little sister was extremely excited to see me and have me sleep over in her room. Three year-olds are super cute. I am a little sad about not being at school but I know that it will be good for me. I don't yet know what I will do today but I have been editing my book to submit to a contest which is really exciting and nerve-wracking that it might actually get published.

Nightly Journal 10/4/16

Not much happened today but I am now back home and making plans to proceed with my recovery away from school. Hopefully everything will go well and I will post more tomorrow.

Morning Journal 10/4/16

I took some melatonin so that I would sleep better and it worked a little. I still woke up around 4 am and couldn't sleep again until around 6. The hotel beds were pretty comfortable but also gave me a back ache and were a little too hard. I watched Tiny House Big Living and am in awe of people that decide they can live with that little space. I also looked at puppies this morning online because I wanted to see how hard it is to find King Charles Spaniels near where I live. Apparently, it is super difficult. Here is an adorable picture of some just because..

Bugs can be cute too

Quote of the Day

Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground. 

-Theodore Roosevelt 

 

Nightly Journal 10/3/16

Good things about today:
I had Jimmy Johns for dinner.
I got some packing done in my room.
I got to see my favorite professors.


Something good I did for myself today:
Take the rest of the semester off so that I can focus on my mental health.

Something I look forward to tomorrow:
Continuing to work on my blogs.

I am a little sad that I am leaving school but everyone has been agreeing that it is a good idea. I am just nervous and anxious about not being in school and people judging me. Everyone says it is okay and that my mental health is important and I agree it just was a hard decision to make.

Early Morning Thoughts

Everything is so quiet in the morning. Then suddenly, bird start chirping and the sky starts getting lighter and lighter. Morning comes at the quietest time but night comes during dances and dinners. I guess that happiness is  probably the same, coming in the quiet instead of the loud and busy.

10/2/16 Nightly Journal

3 good things about today:
1. I got to talk to my baby sister.
2. I put up Halloween decorations.
3. I got a few new pokemon in Pokemon Go.

Something good I did for myself today:
Clean up my desk and do my hw.

Something I am looking forward to tomorrow:
Going to my club meeting.


Today was a little rough, especially this morning. I woke up super early and was tired for most of the day. It rained, which is okay, except it meant I couldn't bike to my friend's house and I had to walk which took a long time. I felt depressed randomly during the day and wanted to cry so I started watching New Girl on Netflix. Here is a gif of a baby elephant that I really like.

Live your Dream

If someone tells you, "you can't do that" or "you can't be that"....prove them wrong.

Be a pianist hedgehog...live your dream.

Quote of the Day 10/2/16

Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy. 

-Anne Frank 

Red Panda Sleeping

I wish I was as cute as a red panda when I slept...

Self Talk

I am strong, I can get through this.
I am beautiful.
I am thoughtful and caring.
I am charismatic and fun.
No one is going to leave me.
No one hates me.
No one settles for me.
I am not second.
I am smart and my future is bright.
I am not perfect, I make mistakes and that is okay.
I do not have to be happy all the time.
My illness doesn't define me but my ability to get through it does.
Life can be hard but it is not against me.
When life is hard, getting through it makes me stronger.
I am likable and I have friends.
I am creative and unique.
I don't have to try to be anyone else because I am me.

I need an emotional support animal

I have been asking my friends what they think about me getting an emotional support animal and all of them agreed I would benefit from the love, companionship, and regularity having esa would provide. I want to get a puppy and train it to do things that would be helpful to me such as making sure I do more with my day than just sit on my laptop. It would give me something to live for and focus on but money is an issue. If you want to help out please donate to my campaign at https://www.unified4people.com/home/campaign/1154

Morning Journal 10/2/16

I woke up super early so hopefully I can get a bunch of homework done. I slept a lot better than I did last night but and still a little tired.
Today I hope to get prepared for classes tomorrow. I am a little scared of going back to classes but my teachers are being understanding. It is nice to have such support here at school but I feel really lonely without my girlfriend. I can get through this though. I am sure of it.

Kittens are things to live for

10/1/16

3 things good today:
1. Went swimming
2. Went to an art show with my mom
3. Wore my new Pokemon shorts

Something I did for myself:
Took a 2 mile walk

Something I'm looking forward to tomorrow:
Sleeping in

Positive Quote of the Day

“you can, you should, and if you’re brave enough to start, you will. "

-Stephan King

Fundraiser for an Emotional Support Dog

I have been heavily considering getting an Emotional Support Dog but, being a college student, money is an issue. An ESA would give me something to live for and help me focus on the now as well as help with my depression and anxiety.  I started a fundraiser to hopefully help take some of the pain of paying for it off even just a little. If you would like to donate or help out please share or go to https://www.youcaring.com/madeleine-kuennen-660750 every penny counts.

Selfie for the day

I love this hat  <3 <3 <3

Midday Journal 10/1/16

I went to the art show with my mom and got a bracelet that is really pretty. She went home after that because she can't stay with me at college forever. After she left, I went to lunch in the dining hall and got an omelet and it was super delicious. I wore my Legend of Zelda hat and a new shirt my mom gave me. I think I look pretty good today even though I am super tired.

Random Thoughts

I'm the main character of my life and now my hair is blue. I guess my life is an anime.

Morning Journal 10/1/16

It turns out that there is no RPG Vampires came today which is a little sad but the local art show is running in the town square. I can't wait to go and look at all of the cool stuff! I didn't sleep super well but it is my first day back. Hopefully I will start sleeping better soon.

Puppy Pic of the Day

Positive Quote of the Day

Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow.

 -Helen Keller

photo: Madeleine Kuennen, Germany 2012

9/29/16 A Post From In-Paitent

3 positive things:
1. I made a friend.

2. I didn't feel depressed or suicidal at all today.

3. The chicken tenders were really good.

Something I did good today:
Go to all the groups and activities.

Something I look forward to tomorrow:
Going home.

9/30/16

1. I came home from the hospital today.

2. My new phone arrived today.

3. My outfit looks killer (Imo)


Something Good I did for myself today:
I picked up my medicine from walmart.


Something I have planned for tomorrow:
RPG Vampires game with my friends.